Crack the Crunch with the Crunch Breaker

Another post recession trend; Monday to Friday lodgers.

It started when a friend told me down the pub about a great way to earn some extra income without a big hassle. She had taken on a lodger.

So, what’s so different about that, you may ask?

This is a ‘Monday to Friday’ lodger, who only stays with you during the working week. So the weekends revert back to normal.

My interest was tweaked.

Monday to Friday (www.mondaytofriday.com) have been going for a while, but have come into their own during this recession. And it makes sense all round.

Many professionals work in London from other parts of the UK and beyond but can’t afford (or don’t want) to rent a flat for the full month. Plus there are many employees who have to pay for expensive hotels each week for consultants to work in the capital.

Monday to Friday theoretically makes sense.

So I took the plunge.

We now have a Monday to Friday lodger who’s from Dublin but has to be in London each week. She spends 3 nights a week with us – her company are ‘over the moon’ because we are much cheaper than a hotel and our lodger has her own room and bathroom and tells us it’s ‘home from home’.

Monday to Friday are on a growth surge and so they should. Like ZipCar, it’s a simple idea that makes sense.

Another successful post recession trend.

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Be wary of creating a caring face

Next month, Bulgari’s 11-city touring jewellery exhibition, Between Eternity and History, will end with a start-studded auction at Christie’s in New York with the aim of raising $10m for Save the Children’s Rewrite the Future campaign. So writes the Financial Times in their Asian international edition (http://www.ft.com/home/asia).

The great and the good will be there – Ben Stiller, Sting, Willem Defoe and Julianne Moore, with the New York event culminating in an event that has taken in cities such as Rome, London and Beijing.

Charity has become a tried and tested way to ease consumer malaise at spending on conspicuous luxury, whilst reinforcing brand credentials as being caring and responsible.

But is the consumer becoming more cynical?

Look at Montblanc. Last month the company caused international controversy with the launch of a $23,000 18-carat pen to celebrate the 140th anniversary of the of birth of Mahatma Ghandi. Montblanc was (rightly in my opinion) accused of exploiting Ghandi – liberator, champion of egalitarianism and simple living – in order to enter the Indian luxury market. Despite Ghandi’s grandson endorsing the promotion and Montblanc donating $148,000 too build a shelter for rescued children, the anger was widespread.

And did nothing to enhance the brand worldwide.

Is this the new ‘caring face’ of luxury?

This is sector I know well but frankly I am a cynic on this line of marketing. Last month Gucci paired with Mary J Blige to launch a Center for Women, Jimmy Choo created Project PEP, selling a range of handbags to support Elton John’s Aids Foundation, and Naomi Campbell paired with Louis Vuitton to launch a handbag in support of the White Ribbon Alliance.

Mmmmm. I remain a cynic.

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China coming out of recession – the numbers are mind-numbing…

I suppose it’s as if we’ve been cowering in our bunkers for the past year whilst the recession rages around us; banks collapsing, mass unemployment, consumer fear.

We’ve become used to recession.

Poor figures. Bad news.

Agreed –the past few months have shown an improvement but we all know that any recovery is fragile.

So it was with some interest that I arrived in China recently. I had heard of mass redundancies there too – millions losing jobs as factory after factory closed.

What I found was an amazing ‘can do’ attitude by everyone. Yes – the recession had been tough but it was the fault of the US and UK, not Asia, it was explained to me.

In one meeting I had, I was told that the company, a major power in retailing globally, had decided to turn its attention away from the West and to China, which is where the future lay.

Open the South China Morning Post and the numbers are mind-numbing; it stated that growth in mainland China’s industrial and retail output accelerated last month. Industrial production, which accounts for over 40% of China’s economic output, rose 16.1% in October, up from September’s 13.3%. Annual growth would meet the 8% target.

Gordon Brown would be a permanent fixed grin if that was the case in the UK.

Retail sales were up over 16% too, in a sign that the Chinese are shopping again. Looking at the shopping malls and restaurants in Shanghai and Beijing, they certainly are.

Cynics would say that the numbers are massaged. Maybe that’s the case, but I have no doubt that this country is growing rapidly once more. Vehicle sales were up 72% on 2008, with sales of 1.22 million units for October alone. 30 years ago only senior government employees or the very rich owned a car at all.

This is the market of tomorrow. And if there is a wider post recession trend, then it is the rise and rise of Asia.

I for one will be spending more time developing this massive potential over the coming year.

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Obama-san gets it right. Keep bowing Barack

The news across the front of every newspaper in Asia screams the same headlines, and I have no doubt it’s the same in the US and Europe.

Did Obama bow too low during his recent visit to Japan, when he met Emperor Akihito and his wife? (Singapore Straights Times http://www.straitstimes.com/Breaking+News/World/World_20091122.html).

Certainly the Republican right have mocked Obama; no less than a rebuke from former vice-president Dick Cheney that ‘there is no need for an American president to bow to anyone’. Accusations that Obama was groveling to a foreign leader are widespread in the US, but what is all the fuss about?

As a regular traveler to Asia and other parts of the world, there are some simple rules to gain respect; adapt to the local culture.

Every nuance, every action is read one way or another;

• How do you present a business card in Asia?
• Would it be normal to give a bear hug in Russia?
• Is it standard practice to bring a gift in some parts of Asia?
• What does it mean when your male host holds your hand in the Middle East?
• Do you kiss cheeks 2 or 3 times in Belgium?
• Should you look your host straight in the eye when toasting vodka in Eastern Europe?
• What do you say when your host suggests you continue your meeting in the sauna?

Plus

• How low do you bow in Japan and what it the protocol?

Mastering the art of bowing is a must for all Japanese when they start working life, so it’s useful to know what the etiquette is:

• A 15-degree bow is appropriate when passing someone in the corridor
• A 30-degree bow is the most common and is used for welcoming a guest or entering or leaving a conference room.
• A 45-degree bow is for important clients, apologies or formal occasions such as weddings.
• The rare 90-degree bow is reserved for the very important such as the Emperor.

One Japanese blogger wrote ‘it’s good to see a modest Obama-san. With him I feel a sense of intimacy never felt before with other US presidents’.

The US has a lot of bridge-building to re-gain respect internationally. Obama was 100% right in what he did. It may seem odd in the US mid-west, but in Asia it has raised his profile considerably and shows he has humility as well as strong leadership skills.

He adapted to local culture.

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As Obama arrives, I leave. It’s all go in Shanghai

Last Sunday I was in Shanghai airport on my way to Hong Kong, sipping a beer, waiting for my flight to be called. At the same time, Barack Obama was due to arrive, at the start of a 3 day Presidential visit of China.

Shanghai is an extraordinary place – one of the biggest cities in the world, thriving and buzzing. The commercial centre of Mainland China.

Obama – loved with almost saint-live reverence outside his own country, represents so much to the Chinese people.

The ability of the underdog to win
Freedom to all
Self expression
Equal rights.

I was therefore shocked (but sadly not surprised) to learn how so much of Obama’s visit was censored by the Chinese authorities.

Obama went to a local college the following day in Shanghai and spoke about the importance of freedom and equality. This was on the news the following day in Hong Kong and other countries, but not in Mainland China, where it had been censored out of the news.

It simply hadn’t happened.

Ask a young Chinese what they can and can’t do and it will be a shock to you and I.

• Facebook banned
• Twitter banned
• Heavily censored internet coverage and website access
• No BBC
• Permission denied to travel in parts of the country or the same city
• Only government approved Western films allowed

Plus many other restrictions you and I would take for granted.

This country has a long way to go. Of course I respect all cultural differences but the Chinese system is one of flexible communism – an entrepreneurial spirit but of total control.

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Last week’s big birthday was …..

The barcode.

It killed off the traditional shop and gave us the checkout girl. Beep. Beep. Beep

Last week saw the 57th birthday of the barcode.

Yes – I know it’s unbelievably nerdy to say it but it’s a fascinating fact.

On the 438th anniversary of the Battle of Lepanto, what would have been Heinrich Himmler’s 109th birthday, it’s the glorious 57th birthday of the barcode that we know about.

And the reason we know about it is that Google decided to commemorate it in its ‘doodle’ du jour. That’s how we find out things now. Once, it was the Church calendar that told us; Whitsuntide, Ash Wednesday or Michaelmas. Then it was the newspapers and we all new what the headlines were. Then it was TV, and we all knew when we’d find out who had shot JR. But now it’s some Korean kid in Silicon Valley who decided to tell us when to commemorate in a search engine logo doodle.

And so 8 billion people or so last week logged on to their computers and saw a barcode where ‘Google’ normally is and thought ‘Eh? What’s that? Oh, it must be the anniversary of the barcode…’

Ok – so when did we think it was invented? 1970 – ish maybe? Mid 1960’s at a push? And we were astounded, to find, when we clicked for more information, that it was invented in 1952.

1952! George VI was still alive! And virtually no-one had TV’s let alone barcode scanners. In England we were still driving geese to market but in the US they had developed the barcode.

So – what has it achieved? It’s brought an end to the old fashioned scenario in one’s local shop, where the little man in the white overalls takes the flour tin off the shelf to weigh it out. ‘Baking today Mrs Jones?’

Yup – the barcode certainly killed the shop.

Swipe, swipe blip. Swipe, swipe blip. There are now supermarkets with no checkout staff at all, where you just swipe and blip the barcodes yourself and go home without speaking a word. These are for saddo singletons buying frozen lasagne or soft porn.

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So, Sorrell thinks its going to be a LUV shaped recession

Sir Martin Sorrell, CEO of WPP (the biggest advertising group in the world) is a big cheese. My mate Si writes his speeches and my Missus used to work for him. So when he speaks, people tend to listen. (www.wpp.com)

And he did. This week.

According to the Times (www.timesonline.co.uk) Sir Martin offered a new expression to describe prospects for the world’s economy – he predicted an ‘LUV’ shaped recovery.

Once describing a previous downturn as bath-shaped, Sir Martin has now predicted a 3 speed discovery in 2010.

He said the recovery would be L-shaped for Western Europe, U-shaped for The US and V-shaped for Brasil, China, Russia and India and the so-called ‘Next 11’ nations which include Turkey, Indonesia and Vietnam.

Sir Martin said that things were now ‘less worse from July to September than from April to June’, but added ‘you would expect that to be the case, given the massive fiscal and monetary stimuli pumped into the world’s economy. If it hadn’t worked, we’d all be in real trouble’.

The big test is what happens when governments start to withdraw their fiscal packages.

The ship is turning but it hasn’t turned yet.

So we’re all going to be ‘LUV’d up …

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Gosh! Strawberry bonbons! It’s like the tuck shop all over again…

Childhood.

My prep school was a Harry Potter-type place – it was great fun. It was a boarding school in the depths of Yorkshire where I was sent for months on end.

At the age of 8, my parents took me up to London to Kings Cross station at the beginning of each term to catch the school train. Grey shorts, shirt and tie with flannel jacket, with a cap on my head – trunk and tuck box in tow.

We caused havoc all the way to Yorkshire on our ‘Hogwarts Express’, throwing fireworks out of the window as we passed each station.

And my parents thought they were giving us the best education possible…. I loved it!

On a Sunday afternoon we were allowed down to the tuck shop where big jars of sweets were stacked along shelves. Sherbet dib dabs, strawberry bonbons, chocolate mice, sheets of toffee and home made fudge, each weighed out and put into little paper bags as we spent our precious pocket money. This was Billy Bunter stuff.

And it’s back! It seems that the recession has prompted a fit of nostalgia in old fashioned tuck-shop treats.

The downturn has fuelled a demand in comfort foods (Tesco report a 200% rise in demand for sirloin steak). M+S has reported a 350% surge in demand for sugary confectionary – wine gums, fizzy cola bottles and rhubarb creams are now all the rage.

The demise of Woolworths ‘pick and mix’ in the UK plus the recession has led to a 9% growth in the sector, set to be worth £2bn in 2010.

So get down to M+S or House of Fraser for your tuck!

But don’t buy liquorice. Liquorice was for losers.

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It won’t be long before we all see a strong Chinese global brand

I have been going to China for many years.

When I first went there were rickshaws everywhere, most people wore bamboo hats and parents would point to me and tell their children – ‘look – a bignose’ (I was told at the time that this is what Westerners were referred to as we have much bigger noses than the Chinese). The villages were surrounded by paddy fields, with farmers standing bare-foot in ankle-deep water, trousers rolled up.

Then a few years later I noticed a massive change. Where once there was a small village at the border with Hong Kong, a city mushroomed out of the fields and Shenzhen was born.

In Panyu, we built a new clothing factory with 5000 workers. Within 2 years Panyu had changed from being a town to becoming Panyu City of over 3 million. The mountain I had seen on my last visit was no longer there. ‘We have removed it’. I was proudly told.

And then just before the 2008 Olympic Games I was in Beijing, and for most parts it could have been a western city. The rickshaws of the past were long gone, now replaced by BMW’s and Mercedes, as the skyscrapers towered over the city skyline.

But China is a fascinating place, if not for its pace of change and innovation. I have never seen such an entrepreneurial spirit and this convinces me of one thing.

I confidently predict that China will soon develop a global brand that will become the envy of the world.

In my childhood I remember seeing electronic goods marked ‘Made in Japan’ which we would patronising refer to as ‘Jap crap’. Well the Japanese learned quickly, and the ‘Jap crap’ are now global brands such as Toyota, Sony and Honda.

China will take up the baton very soon.

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Business bulls**t – and how to interpret it.

A friend of mine recently sat in a meeting with 20 people. It lasted 80 minutes and in that time he counted people saying ‘going forward’ 23 times. That’s once every 3.48 minutes.

So I thought I would track down some ridiculous language used in business meetings and what they actually mean.

All of these are from real situations.

‘In a downturn, you’ve got to ramp it up’
Up, down – my sense of direction is hopeless

‘We employ rounded people’
It’s a large operation

‘An astericks indicates a required field’
I read too many French cartoons as a child

‘Speaking from the gut rather than anywhere else’
Many parts of my body can talk

‘I think we need to build in a bigger carrot than that’
For me, vegetables are crucial to construction

‘20% is nevertheless 20%’
Stating the bleeding obvious is my forte

‘Their logo is definitely symmetrical, only it leans to one side’
My brain is lop-sided

‘Take it as a core thought and develop it as a learning curve from there’
I cannot distinguish between tangible objects, graphs and metaphors

‘I’m just talking out loud here’
Usually I talk silently

‘We have an enviable portfolio of clients that pays testament to our excellence’
Nobody envies our clients – they’re rubbish

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